How good erotic porn enhances our personal pleasure

According to the “Summer of Love” survey conducted by sex toy company, Lovehoney, and the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, the sexual interests of Americans have gotten steamier amid the pandemic. The majority (51%) of the survey’s respondents indicate that couples have gotten more experimental in the bedroom. Though the study didn’t go into specifics on how the respondents spiced up their relationship, I personally encourage using visual erotica to help aid both masturbation and partnered sex.

I understand that everyone has their personal opinions about whether or not porn should be involved in the bedroom. However, I often find that the reason behind the controversy isn’t because of porn itself, but the general shame and stigma surrounding it. Growing up in a more conservative southern culture in the United States, porn was typically considered to be a private matter where people watch it behind closed doors to get them turned on for a quick wank before going to sleep, not something to be discussed in public conservations and definitely not an experience one shares with a partner.

I’m here to assure you that it doesn’t have to be that way. It is indeed possible to use good erotic porn to enhance your sex life with your partner.

For starters, ​it’s creating a shared experience. When a couple shares something together, especially in an intimate or sexual context, they are investing in the longevity of the relationship. Experiences like these also provide insight into a partner’s fantasies, which can especially be a relief for people who are more shy when discussing their sexual fantasies and need a low-pressure outlet to do so. Aside from learning more about a partner’s desires, couples who involve good erotic porn in their sex life may discover new things about themselves.

Besides, the brain is said to be the largest erogenous zone in the body. Many aspects of sex are related to what goes on in the mind, which often means fantasies.

Just be aware that some aspects of mainstream porn aren’t exactly reality. There’s a lot of work that goes into making adult performers and scenes look desirable, so what you see on screen isn’t entirely indicative of what you would experience in real life.

If you’re unsure about ethical porn sites to watch, consider starting with the erotic videos featured in FrolicMe. The sex scenes in these erotic movies are filmed tastefully with high-quality, real, and meaningful sex, that anyone can enjoy watching, whether they’re with someone else or alone.

Now that we’ve covered the essentials, here are 8 specific tips for using good erotic porn to enhance your sex life

Ease into it.

 If you’re already open to the idea of incorporating erotic filming into your sexy time, but you’re not sure where to begin, start out with a simple conversation. Ask your partner what they like and dislike seeing when they watch porn. If you watch porn, share your porn searches and preferences. You both can even send each other links of your go-to videos to masturbate to (with their consent and awareness, of course – perhaps a little NSFW disclaimer!).

Watch good erotic porn together as a form of foreplay.

In the same way that you would watch a movie on Netflix to get in the mood, watch porn instead. In a study led by Irv Binik at McGill University Health Centre in 2006, researchers monitored genital temperature changes to measure sexual arousal and found that, when shown porn clips, men and women alike began displaying arousal within 30 seconds; men reached maximum arousal in about 11 minutes, women in about 12.

Critique the porn together. 

Watching porn together can be as goofy and fun as it is arousing. Is one of the actors or actresses being over-the-top with their moaning? Is the dialogue a little too cheesy? Is there too much plot before the actual love-making? You and your partner can be the judge of that and have a good laugh, and/or romp, in the process.

Re-create what you see.

Porn doesn’t necessarily have to remain a sexual fantasy that you turn on and off like a light switch. If you find yourself in awe of certain scenes because you crave those experiences in your own sex life, don’t be afraid to re-create those fantasies with your partner.

Masturbate as you watch erotic porn together.

When it comes to sexual activities, mutual masturbation doesn’t get enough credit. Not only can it break away from routine sex, but enjoying porn together while masturbating can be a spicy added bonus.

Consider exploring virtual reality (VR) porn together.

The realistic component of VR porn allows its viewers to feel like they’re a part of the experience up close rather than passively staring at a screen.

Make your own erotic movie. 

It can be a fun idea to be creative by making your own erotic movie at home and enjoy watching it together later on. Be careful though! It may be a better idea to use a digital camera and not your cell phone so you don’t have to worry about it accidentally getting uploaded.

Visit an erotic conference.

Various cities around the world host porn expos and erotic conferences where attendees can either meet their favourite adult performers and join interactive classes that help people get more acquainted with their salacious side. Events like these could make an unforgettable date night!

Regardless of how you do it, remember that using porn as a way to enhance your sex life and libido overall is a matter of being open-minded to endless possibilities while also creating the space to be honest about your own desires and understanding of the desires of your partner as well. There’s no shame in using good erotic porn to aid your sexual experiences and help you observe new things in the process. Remember, porn is meant to be for entertainment, so it’s worth a try to tap into and explore your fantasies and ultimately enhance your personal pleasure.

About the author

Tatyannah King

Tatyannah King, is a sex coach for the blex app and sex blogger for Swoon, The Odyssey’s only published content channel for dating & relationships, and tabú, a modern and approachable guide to sexual and mental health. For further reading, click on the Linkedin link in profile, to view her latest articles.

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